I sit, basking all too comfortably in the remains of the tantalizingly sweet glow from a glass of red wine and the lights from the beautifully decorated Christmas tree. My stomach is heavy from a few too many forkfuls of pasta with grilled eggplant, artichoke and red peppers. The thought of indulging in a few shards of the left-over peppermint bark flits across my mind...maybe later...after one more glass of wine, perhaps.

The candles flicker in their various glass holders, situated on every surface available around the apartment and I snuggle deeper into the arm chair in an attempt to achieve comfort as my thoughts begin to roam and ramble once more. Ebinezer Scrooge was visited by ghosts of Christmas past...and I feared now, after conjuring them with my own powerful thoughts today that I may have invoked a few to remain...and haunt my mind as I convene at this time.

I take hiatus now and glance at him sitting across the room from me on the sofa, those now so familiar but nevertheless continuously striking dark features, lit by his computer monitor. His fingers diligently wandering to his forehead in thought as he sits and reads something...probably a sports website...more than likely basketball if I were to wager a deduction.

Another sip of wine. My hand clutches the bulbous goblet and something catches my eye. It is sparkling as it tacitly embraces the reflection of the luminous Christmas tree across from me. That is something I really love about a tree filled with lights. It is eternal -- it is replicated in everything...and I am virtually surrounded by it.

I look at him and wonder what our future will hold. My past holds so much anger, so much hurt and so much disappointment...but what will my future hold? Although he may never have celebrated this particular holiday prior to knowing me, he is exceedingly indulgent with my childhood stories and thoughts of how Christmases of the future will pan out...Christmases of our own family, now that we are officially "one".