Honestly, where do you people find the time? Between Is My Blog Burning, Sugar High Friday and Wine Blogging Wednesday, my social blogging calendar was full. Now there's Paper Chef, the End of Month Egg on Toast Extravaganza and Does My Blog Look Good in This? to contend with and Interviews with featured bloggers to read. And now Kate of The Accidental Hedonist has announced the 2004 Food Blog Awards! Noting that the Bloggies didn't include any food-related blogs she has taken it upon herself to host the first event recognizing what we all do here everyday. Yay, Kate!

I feel as though I have been swept up into some sort of crazy wind storm and then dropped, unceremoniously on the ground when my own power of flight failed me. Maybe it's more like the tornado in The Wizard of Oz and I'm flying in my little house, seeing people flash by my window but unable to catch up to them. Then the house is plopped down in a strange land and all I can see are the striped socks of someone I never knew, sticking out from under my front porch. Have I ticked off her sister? I certainly hope not. I just feel a bit lost these days.

I remember, a few years back, when I had a personal on-line journal and was a part of that community. I wrote a lot, scrounged my heart and head on a quasi-daily basis, sharing my life with people I had never met. Then came the annual awards ceremonies, in which I was nominated for "best entry" for something I had written; I believe it was a testimony to how much I loved my father. I didn't win, there were much better, much more "popular" journals out there, written by people who had the time to commit themselves to all the conferences, all the events and all the hoop-la of the on-line journalling world. I had a job, was attending nursing school full-time and was dealing with some serious life-altering decisions at the time. I was writing to simply sort through all that I was feeling and thinking, not to receive an award for it.

So why did it bother me so much when I didn't win? It's probably that old popularity contest thing. In grade school I had boyfriends and girlfriends and was, I supposed what could be called "popular" with the "in" crowd. The high school I attended had almost 3000 students, all of which were divided into cliques with a strict hierarchy...which I staunchly disregarded, to my own detriment I suppose. I was a cheerleader, I dated a football player, but I also joined in with the theatre crowd and was friends with the computer and photography kids. I took classes that only motor heads took (printing - the kind with big printing presses and tungsten light boxes), got off-the-charts grades in English and became better friends with a group of guys my brother (three years my elder) knew than I was with people in my own grade. I knew just about everyone, but was not that elusive "popular girl"...I doubt many people from that school would remember me, were they to hear my name now, but I enjoyed high school, probably more than most.

So what am I getting at? I don't know. I guess reading through the nominations for the Floggies made me remember what it feels like to think you are a significant part of a community and yet remain not so significant at the same time. I am not going to whine and stomp my little feet, because frankly I don't have the time...I have my own favourite blogs to nominate, interviews to read, WBWs to plan for, SHFs to support (which Viv is hosting in January!), DMBLGITs to enjoy, EoMEoTEs to indulge in and Paper Chef competitions to look forward to. Thank goodness IMBB is taking a holiday hiatus until January!